Stop the noise. Introverts resist three types of noise

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NoiseAs I look at the Christmas lights that are hung on my neighbors’ bushes, fences, and house rafters; I wonder if the colors of said lights are a reflection of the owners’ preference for introversion or extraversion.

And from what I know of the residents, my assumption that introverts prefer white lights and that extraverts prefer colored lights is an accurate one. But this is only an assumption. I’m not aware of any theories that talk about preferences in color.

Looking at the colored lights from my front steps, I am aware of the “loud” colors. My lights, on the other hand, are white; soft white, in fact. To me they’re subtle, like my personality.

What I know for a fact is that introverts resist noise. Their tolerance for noise is not as great as their counterparts’. They hear the noise in various settings.

Introverts Resist Noise from Conversation

The noise of which I speak comes first in the form of verbal communications. Introverts can only take so much talk before they’ve had enough and feel they must run for the hills.

I give as an example the times I go to a public place like Starbucks where all I want to do is focus on writing posts or preparing presentations; and without fail the person sitting next to me wants to engage in conversation. (Read my post on disrupting alone time.)

In other cases I’m the social butterfly, like when I’m watching my child’s soccer or basketball games. I’ll talk throughout the whole game, always aware of the other person’s desire for conversation. If I sense there is no desire to reciprocate, I’ll respect the person’s wishes.

Extraverts, I feel, are always up for a conversation. It’s their way of recharging their batteries. It’s their level of energy that surpasses that of an introvert. But their unwanted talking is noise.

Noise, Noise

Another example of noise that introverts can do without is actual…noise. I for one can only handle so many devices playing in the household. The television, radio, and my daughter’s tablet playing Netflix playing all at once is maddening.

All of this is enough to make me want to shut everything off, which is what I do sometimes. This raises my family members brows, as if I’m being a downer. No, it’s just too noisy.

Some people are able to read while watching TV or listen to the stereo. Not me. I need quiet with a slight bit of white noise in the form of a fan or air conditioner. It is my introversion that requires the slightest bit of noise, not a blaring television.

If you’re looking to destroy an introverted person’s attention span, just put them in a situation where they feel overstimulated. Due to increased sensitivity to their surroundings, introverts struggle with feeling distracted,  and sometimes overwhelmed…(10 Ways Introverts Interact Differently With The World)

Research shows that introverted infants react differently to noise than extraverted ones. The introvert infants become disturbed, cry, and thrash around more than the extravert infants. For highly sensitive people, 70% of whom are introverts, noise is particularly noticeable.

Noise from Crowds is a Distraction

Loud pubs and sporting events may get on the nerves of introverts, while arousing the extravert. The extravert is drawn to the noise like moths to light. The introverts feels like escaping the setting like a cornered animal.

Worse yet would be trying to have a conversation in a loud pub, where you want to say—and do say, “Let’s go somewhere quiet.” Your extraverted friend is fine with the music; he’s quite enjoying it.

It’s a matter of functioning. How well do you function at work when people are talking around you? As an extravert, it’s a distraction. But as an introvert, it’s almost impossible to get your work done.

After a workshop, I want to retreat to my cubicle, where I can sit and relax away from people who would like to talk endlessly (it seems). This is not uncommon among introverts. We’re not antisocial; we just need to get away from the noise.

Back to Noise from Colors

Nowhere in literature can I find evidence that introverts are more sensitive to color, but this doesn’t mean it isn’t true. It makes sense that extraverts prefer the “loudness” that bright colors emit.

When my wife and I talk about Christmas lights, we admit that the soft white ones draw less attention to us. For this introvert, at least, I prefer the softness of white lights.

Dear college students, 7 ways to watch your attitude

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Angry Woman

This post originally appeared on YouTern.com. Although it addresses college students, it also applies to all jobseekers. 

I’m 52 years old, a father of three children, two of whom are of college age; I coach soccer, drive a van, and work in a section of a city where the high school is located. What this last factoid has to do with my life is that I’m acutely aware of the inappropriate behavior of the students that erupts on occasion.

To say “all” the students act inappropriately would paint me as a grumpy old man, as my children sometimes call me. It would also be inaccurate and unfair to most of the “kids” who are outstanding citizens.

What does the aforementioned have to do with you?

You are four years removed from the high school students I see roaming the streets around where I work.

You have more maturity than them.

You are earning a degree or have earned.

You are in the process of looking for work.

You may find landing your new job challenging. Be prepared.

No one will argue that being unemployed isn’t a traumatic experience, especially me. I was on the receiving end approximately ten years ago. Being unemployed isn’t what I’d wish on anyone.

This said, if jobseekers aren’t mindful of the attitude they project, it can hurt their chances of finding their next job. This is perhaps the most challenging thing jobseekers can accomplish, keeping their attitude in check.

One’s negative attitude shows itself in many mannerisms. Failing to control these mannerisms can prevent you from getting to the interview. Below are some signs of a negative attitude. These are things you should keep in mind when going out in public.

Arrogance impresses no one. You may have been outstanding in school, and you may be outstanding in the future, but keep in mind that diplomacy is your best card at this time. You will be relying on many people to help you in your job search, and most people don’t appreciate a superior attitude.

Apparel is one aspect of your attitude. During the summer it’s hot out there, but please refrain from wearing gym shorts and brand-name tee-shirts. At all times make sure you are well-groomed and presentable—you never know when a potential employer might be just around the corner. Wear what you like in your apartment.

Your countenance is more noticeable than you think. I’ve witnessed people who walk into the career center looking as if they’d like to strike anyone in their path. Their mouth looks like it was chiseled into a constant frown. There seems to be hatred in their eyes. This can be intimidating, let alone off-putting. The job search is a tough time in your life, but try to smile, as hard as you may try.

Be outgoing…or at least fake it. For you introverts (I can relate), try to use every opportunity to network. You don’t have to see networking as only going to large arranged events—maybe your thing is small get-togethers. Real networking is a daily thing and that’s why you have to be on your game every day.

Mind your manners. “Thank you,” “It was great seeing you,” “Hope your day is wonderful,” etc., go a long way. These are things we learned in Kindergarten, yet not all of us practice the niceties as much as we should. I am often thanked by customers after a workshop or in an e-mail. Yet they’re the ones who do the hard work, and their hard work will result in a job.

Don’t appear desperate and despondent. Most people want to help you, but if you seem like you are giving up the battle—your peers, career advisors, and people employed in your industry—will doubt your ability to succeed at your next job. “Don’t let ‘em see you sweat.”

Hide your anger. My last point is one I make with my workshop attendees, who for the most part are composed. I tell them their anger comes across loud and clear and…it impresses no one. Yes, you are frustrate because you’re having a hard time getting a job offer; but people are not drawn to anger. They’re pushed away.

Why does this matter?

Simply put, your job search is ongoing. You are being judged wherever you go. The man or woman who has the authority to hire you, may be standing behind you in the checkout line. Those who try to help you take into account the aforementioned aspects of your overall attitude. If given the choice to recommend someone for a position, anyone is likely to back the person who has their attitude in check.

As I’ve said, maintaining a pleasant demeanor and appearing positive is difficult under an extremely stressful situation like being unemployed; but I’ll guarantee you that a negative approach to conquering unemployment will not lead to quick employment. Be mindful at all times how you appear to others.

6 reasons why you need to stay on LinkedIn

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walking awayEven after  you get your next job.

It never fails. After my customers land a job, they immediately abandon LinkedIn like it’s the plague. I’m always glad when they land, but beforehand I tell them, “When you get your next job, don’t leave LinkedIn. You may need it in the future.”

I’m afraid my words fall on deaf ears, and I just don’t get it. They use LinkedIn to get a job, but then give up on it. Don’t they know the many benefits they’ll derive from using LinkedIn when they’re working? Apparently not.

Here are what I consider the five reasons why you need to stay on LinkedIn after you land your next job.

Develop Your Network Before You Need It

This is the first reason why you need to stay on LinkedIn, to accumulate more quality connections. Not only can they help you in the form of future possibilities, you can help them if they’re in the hunt.

I have to retract what I said above; some of my customers have been selfless in alerting others to positions in their new companies. That’s good networking.

The first time I meet my customers is usually when they’re scrambling to build up their network. They’re frantic because they have less than 100 connections, wondering why they’re not getting any play. Keep this in mind, I advise them. Be smarter the next time.

Develop Your Reputation, Be Relevant

To build up your reputation, you want to come across as the authority in your industry. What better time to write posts on LinkedIn than when you’re getting back into the mix?

A person who lands a project management job in medical devices can write about the development of these devices, where they’re of most value, how they benefit patients, etc. Not only is this person demonstrating her knowledge, she’s helping to sell her company’s product.

One of my connections works for a company that develops office management software. He starts a teaser on LinkedIn Publisher with a link to the company’s write-up of the product, which he wrote, by the way. This is a perfect way for him to gain exposure on LinkedIn, as well as sell his product line.

Continue To Learn

I bet one of the reasons why you landed your job is because of what you may have read or discussed on LinkedIn. For example, you may have read an article you found through one of your connections. Or you may have read an article on Pulse.

Maybe a discussion you participated in one of your groups prompted you to connect with the originator of the discussion, which led to a lead after your relationship was forged.

As I mentioned above, you should be increasing your thought leadership. So take advantage of what people in your industry write. LinkedIn is a great source of information. Take advantage of it.

One of my connections, Janet Wall, wrote: “Yes, LI is not only for job hunting, in fact I don’t see it as the prime reason for LI. It is for learning, and I learn so much from my connections!”

Engage, Engage, Engage

Despite what you’ve been told, visiting LinkedIn four times a week ain’t gonna do it. A minimum of once a day—or seven times a week—should be your level of engagement. You want to be seen, not forgotten. And don’t only appear when/if you need to make a move. (Read my post on why you should engage on LinkedIn.)

Many people, including myself have written posts on how you can engage—and be remembered—with your connections. One post that I particularly like is 10 Status Updates for Job Seekers by Hannah Morgan. In it she gives LinkedIn members 12 ideas on how to share updates. Check it out!

But engagement doesn’t stop there. You can send direct messages to your connections informing them of how you’re doing—hopefully you’re doing well. You can also use a feature called Keep in Touch, which lets you congratulate your connections on their work anniversaries, birthdays, new jobs, etc.

Enhance Your Company’s Image

You are representing the company for which you now work; therefore, you must have a stellar profile. When people visit your company’s LinkedIn page, they want to see profiles that impress them. See the profiles as if they’re fine paintings in a museum.

This doesn’t only apply to sales people. It applies to every function in the organization. People will have more faith in the company for which you work if the employees come across as competent accountants, publish relation managers, technical trainers, and CEOs.

When your manager asks you, “Bob, why do you have such a well-developed LinkedIn profile?” as my manager once asked me, explain that your LinkedIn profile and engagement will only benefit the company. If your manager tells you to shut it down, you will realize you joined the wrong organization.

Pay it forward.

As I mentioned earlier, some of my customers get back to me with jobs that their companies are trying to fill. Some of these jobs are not yet posted; they’re some of the 80% of hidden jobs. These are the best jobs!

Remember how you were helped during your job search. Maybe you were just alerted to a job that panned out, or someone delivered your resume to the hiring manager of your department. Don’t you think it’s time to return the favor to someone else?

Your work on LinkedIn is not over when you’ve landed your next job. See it as just beginning. See it as an investment. For all of my former customers who are secure in their employment, I am happy. I just ask that you prepare for your future.

Photo: Flickr, Trudie S

Don’t swallow the honest pill with these 3 interview questions

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Nevervous Interviewee

Malls drive me nuts. If Dante had another ring of hell to add, it would consist of shoppers aimlessly walking around looking for the nearest exit. I feel this way five minutes after being in one that my daughters drag me to.

I’m content waiting for them while they run off to shop. But all the soft seats outside the stores are usually taken by husbands and fathers who constantly check their watch to see how long they’ve been waiting for their wife and kids.

Malls drive me nuts for another reason. We fathers hear things we don’t want to. My girls love stores like Forever 21, Abercrombie and Fitch, The Gap, and Victoria Secret….

Hold on there, I look at my youngest daughter, Did I hear you right, dear? You went to Victoria Secret?  “Yeah,” my eldest daughter says, “she bought a lacy bra.” TMI

You’re probably wondering what this has to do with interviews. Not much, other than to say that some job candidates seem to, as I bring up in my interview workshops, swallow the honest pill and spill way too much information.

And why do candidates do this? Because they’re unprepared for the tough, yet predictable, questions like: Tell me about one of your greatest weaknesses. One answer I hear often from jobseekers is their claim of being a perfectionist.

Thinking this is an admirable trait, I tell them that employers imagine a scenario that plays out something like this:

The candidate has a two-page addendum that has to be completed by the end of the day. After struggling with the right verbiage the whole day, it’s still not completed. This is something that should have taken half an hour to complete. This answer is the perfect interview killer.

Tell me something about yourself. Here’s another one that provokes too much information from the candidate. This is a pretty straightforward directive, but one for which candidates are not prepared.

What’s required for this question is a 30-second commercial that describes your value to the prospective employer. It’s your value proposition that includes relevant accomplishments. Yet many candidates feel the pressure and say too much about silly stuff.

One candidate I interviewed answered this question by telling me she planned to be married in three years and have kids in five. For me, the interview was already over. This was definitely too much information and demonstrated how unprepared she was for the interview.

Tell me about a time when you failed to communicate effectively. Imagine a candidate answering this directive as such: “I guess it was a time when I had an argument with my boss,” the candidate says.

The interview is intrigued. “Tell us about that, John.”

“Well, I didn’t like the way she criticized my quarterly report. She said it was full of spelling errors, inaccuracies, and grammatical mistakes. Plus, she told me it was too short. So I sort of lost it and yelled at her.”

“What was the result of that argument, John?” says the interviewer.

“It wasn’t too good.”

It wasn’t too good? Wrong example and way too much information.

It’s all fine and well for me to poke fun at job candidates, imaginary and real; although, I’ve heard similar responses from some of my customers. So here’s my advice. BE READY FOR THESE QUESTIONS.

For example, my greatest weakness is how I struggle with spelling. I can string a sentence or two together, but I’d be lost without Spell Check. I’ve done much to improve it, including buying a calendar with the day’s word and definition.

Is this weakness true? Yes. Would it kill me to bring it up at an interview? Probably not, unless I were looking for a teaching job. Right or wrong, I’m ready for the weakness question.

Malls really drive me nuts, especially when I’m there with my anxious son and daughters who share too much TMI.. And it sucks when candidates arrive at interviews unprepared, thereby losing their wits and also give TMI.

The 8 lessons to learn from the job search

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Job seeker climing stairsBefore you even send out your résumé.

If there’s anyone who’s tired of hearing, “The job search is a full time job,” it’s me. This cliché is as worn out as my favorite pair of jeans. So I’m proposing a different saying: “The job search is like going to school.” Why? Because going to school implies learning something, whereas a full time job can mean a whole slew of things.

Remember school where your intellect was challenged, where you studied hard and debated harder, where you looked forward to your next round table lesson on Jung and King Lear? Or the challenging material you tackled in Embedded Computing in Engineering Design? It was good stuff.

The lessons of the job search are of a different nature but are important in their own regard. The following eight lessons I propose you must learn before sending out your résumé.

Lesson One: It sucks losing your job. This is the first lesson you learn from the job search. And how well you handle this it will determine your success. Let me advise you to allow yourself a period of suffering, no less than three days, no more than two weeks*. It’s not clear if everyone goes through the five stages of grief in the same order, or if you’ll even experience all five stages of grief, which are.

  1. Denial and Isolation
  2. Anger
  3. Bargaining
  4. Depression
  5. Acceptance

For example, you may skip denial and isolation, bargaining, or depression. I would personally call depression a bit strong; I prefer despondency. My point being is that no two people handle the emotional aspect of the job loss the same.

Lesson Two: Know what you want to do before acting. Picture saying to your kids and wife/husband that the whole family is going on a trip, and they ask, “Where?” Your response is “I don’t know.” Your family members won’t have faith in your planning ability. This lesson is important because without knowing what you want to do—where you’re going on your trip—you’ll be spinning your wheels. You’ll lack direction and be totally ineffective.

So when job seekers tell me they’re not sure what they want to do, I tell them until they know what they want to do, all the dandy advice they’ve been receiving is a waste of time. There are numerous career tests and personality assessments you can take that gauge your interests, skills, and values, but I’m a firm believer in also searching your soul for what you want to do.

Lesson Three: Determine how much time you’ll dedicate to your search. I’ll ask my workshop attendees how many hours they worked at their last job. Forty? Forty plus? Many will raise their hand when I say forty plus, just as I thought. Then I ask them if they need to dedicate forty plus hours to their job search. Most of them raise their hand. (Remember the cliché, “The job search is a full time joby?”)

I tell my attendees that I disagree with spending forty plus hours a week looking for work. In my mind, looking smarter is better than looking harder. One story I tell them is of a person I knew years ago who was out of work. How he told me his family life was suffering because he was spending 60 + hours on the job search. Follow the following lessons in order to be smart in your job search.

Lesson Four: Be organized. I remember when I was out of work and receiving a call from a company I didn’t recognize sending my resume to. At first I tried to buy time until I finally had to ask the caller which company she was calling from.

To say this was an embarrassing conversation is an understatement. If your strength is not organization, it must become one of yours quickly. The job search requires being organized so you don’t receive phone calls from companies you don’t recognize. Trust me, it can be embarrassing.

Read this excellent article from Quint Careers on Ten Sure Fire Ways to Organize Your Job Search. My valued connection, Katharine Hansen, provides valuable lessons on being organized in the job search. Check them out.

Lesson Five: Let people know you’re looking for work. This seems like the most obvious lesson, but you’d be surprised how many people don’t let their friends, neighbors, convenience store owner, hair stylist, etc., know they’re out of work. How can these people help you if the don’t know.

I remember years ago when one of my customers came to my office just before Christmas. I asked him what his plans were and he told me his family was hosting the dinner. Great I replied. But what he said threw me for a loop. “It’s going to be weird. No one knows I’m out of work,” he replied. Family and friends can be your best allies.

Lesson Six: Futility 101. Anyone who thinks sending out 600 résumés will result in 300 interviews and 30 job offers probably also believes the sun revolves around the earth. Despite the many blog posts, books, and speakers who say using job boards as the primary method of looking for work is a waste of time; many job seekers still do this.

Six hundred is not a number I drew out of a hat. I recall reading on LinkedIn about a person who was seeking career advice and was bewildered that she hadn’t received one interview. Yes, she had mailed out 600 résumés and waited for the phone to ring.

Lesson Seven: Do your research. Remember when you were in school and had to do research to write papers? Now your research is even more important. So instead of “shotgunning” résumés, research the companies for which you’d like to work. Develop a list of 20 or so companies and determine where there’s growth by going to their websites. For companies showing growth, send approach letters asking to meet with someone at the company for an informational meeting.

Key points: Don’t ask for a job during the informational meetings. Instead ask illuminating questions that create a vibrant conversation, a conversation that will secure an important connection. Who knows, maybe there is a job developing at the company. You might be recommended to the hiring manager if you’re able to impress your new connection.

Lesson Eight: Connect with others. Whether you want to attend networking events or prefer to focus on connecting in the community, make sure you’re identifying people who can be of assistance. LinkedIn’s Companies feature has proved to be a great tool for this, but simply making inquiries can work as well.

One of my customers came to me one day and said, “Bob, I found a job!” Great I told him. “Yeah, but I didn’t network,” he told me. “No, I handed my résumé to my neighbor; he handed it to the hiring manager in the department I wanted to work; I was called in for an interview; and I got the job.” Connecting works in many ways.

Having completed all the lessons above, now it’s time to send your résumé to companies you’ve identified as the ones you’d like to work for. Next we’ll look at the remaining lessons of the job search.

The wonder of paying it forward…

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leaves

…and a story about my son and I raking a neighbor’s yard.

This past weekend I dragged my son out to rake some leaves. Of course he complained and gave me every reason why he shouldn’t have to rake leaves, including having to play Madden 2015 online against his friends.

I told him he’d lose his Xbox if he didn’t rake leaves with me, and he told me I couldn’t do that. It was against the law because he bought it with his own money. I told him he could buy all his meals from now on.

Then he told me that I’d have to pay him ten bucks to rake our leaves. “Ten bucks,” I said. “Seriously?” He said he was serious. I proceeded to tell him that in my day I raked leaves for free.

He retorted that we weren’t living in “your prehistoric days” and that he is a Capitalist out to make some money. Where did he learn about Capitalism, I wondered.

When we walked outside our front door and headed to the left, he asked me where we were going. To Pete’s I told him. I heard his jaw drop. “Why are we raking Pete’s leaves,” he whined.

“Because it’s the right thing to do.”

“Will I get paid?” he asked.

Pete’s yard is the size of half a football field and every inch of it is covered with leaves. When I looked at my son, I thought he was about to cry. Hell, I was about to cry. But I told myself that it was the right thing to do, and I repeated this to my son when I saw him just standing there in disbelief.

He and I both grabbed a rake. I gave him the good one because his whining made me want to kick him in the ass, and I told him I would kick him in the ass if he didn’t start raking. I’ve never touched a hair on his body, but my threat got him going.

At first he started raking the leaves like he was swatting at flies. You know, passive aggressive. I knew his game, though. I told him to do it right. He told me this is how he rakes and that he wouldn’t talk to me.

Nearly an hour went by in silence as we raked at least 10 large piles of leaves. This would easily fill 30 bags. I decided to give my son a break and have him start bagging. But as he began bagging, I heard the familiar sighs coming from him.

“Hey, Bubs,” I said.

“What?” he replied, refusing to look at me.

“Do you know why we’re doing this?”

“You said it’s ‘the right thing,'” he mimicked.

“Have you ever read a book called, Pay It Forward? Actually there’s a movie about the book that we could watch.” This got his attention. “You see, the main character’s a boy who has to do a school assignment on saving the world. So he decides to help three people, with the condition that the three people each help three people, and so on and so on. Eventually people are helping each other across the world.”

“That’s pretty cool,” my son says, stopping to listen.

“You know Pete can’t rake and bag all these leaves himself. He’s kinda too old for it.”

“Yeah.”

“So if we do this for him, it’s like paying it forward.”

“But what will he do for us?” my son asked.

“That’s not the point,” I replied. “The point is that what we do for him will eventually come around to us. Pete doesn’t have to repay us. Do you see what I mean?”

“Yeah.”

“Does it feel good helping Pete?”

“Yeah, it does,” he admitted…and smiled.

We raked and bagged leaves for another hour, and even after that there were a dump truck worth of leaves. I decided that it was good enough when my bleeding blister started stinging. I knew my son wanted to get back to Madden 2015. So we called it a day.

What does this mean for jobseekers?

In the mind of a jobseeker, finding work is the priority. So to think of helping others before helping himself may seem counterintuitive. It’s not, though. Social psychologist say that helping others makes people feel better; it gives them a sense of achievement.

People who understand the true nature of networking are always asking, “What can I do for you?” Not, “What can you do for me?” One of my most valued connections always ends our conversations with, “What can I do for you, Bob?” As he’s out of work, I think to myself, I should be asking him how I can help.

Another great example of a jobseeker helping others is a customer of mine who facilitates a networking group in the area. This is no light task, as he must recruit guest speakers, run the discussions, and create the agenda. What’s his reward for doing this? He is helping people like himself search for work, which gives him a sense of achievement.

When I was out of work, I was responsible for helping two people find jobs. One of them was my neighbor, the other a family friend. I remember alerting my neighbor of a position in our city’s DPW. My wife put in a good word for him. He landed the job easily.

Those who help others understand the concept of paying it forward. It is not a new concept, as I explained to my son, but it does work. It creates great karma, I tell my workshop attendees. Paying it forward epitomizes networking.

I asked the attendees of one of our networking groups to write down one example of how they recently helped someone. The attendees were so involved in this exercise that they wanted to write about more than one time they helped another person. Many of them said the exercise made them feel happy.

Volunteer to help the more needy, such as a homeless shelter or soup kitchen, if you have the time during the holiday season. While your lending a hand, talk about your unemployment status with other volunteers. (You never know where your next lead may come from.)

If you’re looking for a job, find a way to help someone in need this holiday season. It may not directly lead to a job, but it will make you feel better. Most likely the good deed you do for others will come around, just as I explained to my son the day we were raking leaves.

Back to my son and I raking Pete’s leaves

Later that day I found an envelope in our mailbox. In it was a $20 bill meant for my son and me. I could have given my son the $20 for the hard work he’d done, but instead I returned it to Peter, who tried to refuse the money. His protest were met with my simply walking away, with him holding the money in his hand and me smiling as I mounted my stairs.

Photo: Flickr, Graham

The 5 ways employers prefer to fill a position

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And what you should do about it.

Consider this scenario. On Friday the position of Sr. Engineer is announced internally. All employees who want to apply need to submit a résumé detailing their qualifications COB on Monday.

 

CEO

Three people feel they are qualified and hurry to update their résumé over the weekend, save for one who doesn’t have a résumé, has never written one. He’ll have to learn how to write one quickly.

By the end of Monday, when résumés are due, the VP of Engineering shakes the hand of the new Sr. Engineer, who is told to keep this promotion under his hat until the staff meeting on Friday.

The VP wants to receive the résumés, just to make a good show of it. She winks at the new Sr. Engineer as he leaves her office. Again, keep this under your hat, he is told.

This is not news to many people who have witnessed one of their colleagues suddenly be appointed to a coveted position in the company. The more senior employees—those who’ve been around for a while—are least surprised by this move.

Generally speaking, there are five ways employers prefer to fill a position.

One. The scenario above is the most preferred way employers fill a position; from within the company. Ideally they have someone who can fill it quickly and with little fuss. Is it fair to the unemployed outside the company? No.

Unfair to the unemployed, but companies have one thing in mind, filling the position with a safe bet; and who’s safer than someone they know?

The hiring manager is familiar with the abilities, and inabilities, of the company’s employees. As well, promoting from within builds good will in the company. An employer that promotes from within is a good employer. So this is a win-win situation.

Two. The second way employers prefer to fill a position is by taking referrals from their own employees. In some cases the employer will reward the employees with a monetary bonus for referring a person who sticks for, say, three months.

When I was in marketing, I referred my cousin to an IT position in a company for which I worked. I recalled years before how he spread the word of his unemployment at a family gathering, so I brought this up to the powers that be. The CIO read my cousin’s résumé, invited him in for an interview the next day, and offered him a job that day.

I was rewarded one thousand dollars, minus four hundred for taxes. I’ve heard of people who received as much as ten thousand dollars for making a referral. Of course the level of the position to be filled matters.

I never would have referred my cousin unless I was confident of his abilities, which is the case with most employees making a referral. People like me don’t want egg on their face if the person doesn’t work out, even if said person is family. By the way, my cousin worked out extremely well.

Three. At this point the employer has tried his best to find an internal candidate or someone recommended by his employees. Nothing has worked out and the position has to be filled yesterday.

His next move is reaching out to people he trusts outside the company. The employer may reach out to former colleagues, partners, vendors, even people who’ve left the company for greener pastures (boomerang employees).

He trusts these people because they know what he’s looking for in job-related and soft skills. They’re the best bet he has at this point.

A recent survey by Jobvite.com revealed that 40% of hires were from referrals, which made up of only 7% of sourcing efforts. This is significant, given the other methods used and makes one wonder why employers are wasting their time on, say, job boards.

Four. When requesting referrals doesn’t work, the employer’s next step is hiring a recruiter. This is less desirable than seeking referrals because recruiters are expensive (as much as 20% of a candidate’s first annual salary), but palatable because recruiters are more knowledgeable of the industry.

A Forbes.com article talks about the two types of recruiters, retained and contingency. While retained recruiters work strictly for the employer and are more knowledgeable of the industry, the contingency recruiters only get paid when they find the best candidates.

The employer’s cost for hiring a recruiter can range from 15-25% of the applicant’s first year salary. A hefty chunk of change.

Either way, the employer is paying for a few candidates to be delivered to the table. It’s still a risky proposition. Referrals are still the desired source of candidates for the reasons stated above.

Five and finally last. Now it’s desperation phase, because this is when employers advertise their positions. There are two major problems with advertising a position, cost and uncertainty of hiring the right candidate.

You may think that it’s the cost of advertising online is the major concern, but it isn’t; the cost employers feel the most is the time spent reading résumés and interviewing unknown people. When I ask former HMs, who have read a great number of résumés, if they like reading those résumé, approximately 98% of them say they don’t.

With applicant tracking systems in place, you’d think the process would be more manageable and pleasant, but this isn’t the case. For some, reading 25 résumés is reading 25 resumes too many.

Even with the advancement with the ATS, poor candidates get past and make it to the interview. What many recruiters and HMs are experiencing are candidates who are not qualified and, in many cases, have embellished their accomplishments.

What do you do as a jobseeker?

The obvious answer is to become a referral by reaching out to those you know in a desired company. This sounds easier said than done, but the steps you take begin first with determining which companies you’d like to work for. And, most importantly, why? Create a list of 15 target companies.

Next identify people at said companies who can be of assistance. LinkedIn is ideal for this, as most hiring authorities are on LinkedIn. Make use of your online time by using the Companies feature and do advance searches. Work your way up by connecting to people on your level. Also, connect with people who used to work at the company; they can give you some insight.

Remember the number two way employers prefer to fill a position? When you find someone who works at a desired company, fairly late in your conversations, ask if her company offers an employee referral bonus. This would be a great incentive for said employee to refer you to a position, providing she has faith in your abilities and character.

If you were an outstanding employee where you last worked, friends of your employer will come to you. I see this often with my best customers who land jobs based on their personal branding. Former vendors, customers, partners, and colleagues reach out to them.

Attend industry groups where people who are currently employed are networking for business. You are there to offer your expertise either on a paid basis or as a volunteer. You are prepared with personal business cards and your personal commercial. It’s my opinion is that the best people to be with are those who are employed.

One of the best places to network is in your community. You never know when you could run into someone who knows someone who works at one of your target companies. Most important is that people know about your situation and that you’ve clearly explained what you’re looking for.

When you least expect it, your lead will come to you. One of my former customers was approached by his neighbor who had heard my customer was out of work. His neighbor took my customer’s résumé to the HM of the company he worked for. Days later he was interviewed for a position.

The bottom line is that you cannot rely on applying online and waiting to be brought in for an interview. You must become a referral.

Photo: Flickr, Roger Braunstein

Introvert or extravert? Maybe you’re an ambivert

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And how being an ambivert can help in your job search.

I conduct a poll at the beginning of my Myers-Briggs Type Indicator workshop. I ask my attendees to write on the back of a piece of paper if they had the choice to be an introvert or extravert, what they would choose. What do you think they choose? Easily nine out of 10 would prefer to be an extravert.

ambiverts

Their reasons for preferring to be an extravert (remember, we don’t have the option) vary from: extraverts are well liked; they make better small talk; they’re not shy; they get ahead at work; and, by large consensus, their lives are easier.

There’s good news for my attendees if they’re labeled as a slight introvert, they are an ambivert. Susan Cain’s newsletter explains it this way:

Based on your responses, you’re an ambivert. That means you fall smack in the middle of the introvert-extrovert spectrum. In many ways, ambiverts have the best of both worlds, able to tap into the strengths of both introverts and extroverts as needed. See below for information on introverts and extroverts; you’ll likely see part of yourself in both.

Although the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator doesn’t recognize it as a dichotomy, author Daniel Pink writes about the ambivert in To Sell is Human.

In his book Pink claims it’s not very clear extraverts, nor very clear introverts, who make better salespeople. It’s ambiverts who are better at selling (moving). Ambiverts are more balanced and therefore make better salespeople. (Take the assessment here to see if you’re an ambivert.)

Pink writes:

“Extroverts can talk too much and listen too little, [and] overwhelm others with the force of their personalities.” On the other hand, “Introverts can be shy to initiate, too skittish to deliver unpleasant news and too timid to close the deal,” but ambiverts “know when to speak up and when to shut up, when to inspect and when to respond, when to push and when to hold back.”

According to Pink, one out of nine people are proclaimed salespeople, but in actuality nine of nine people are salespeople because they are moving others. This is especially important to job seekers who have to move others while exercising their marketing plan, e.g., their written and verbal communication skills.

When we talk about introversion and extraversion, it generally comes down to energy level or re-charging one’s battery. Extraverts are said to have abundant energy, especially around crowds. Their batteries are re-charged by being with many people.

Introverts are more reserved and prefer smaller groups, which don’t drain their batteries. They need their alone time and, because of this may be seen as reclusive. Stealing away at times recharges the introvert’s battery.

Ambiverts adopt the traits of each side of the continuum; their batteries are charged by being with many people or being alone.

How this helps in the job search

As a general rule, extraverts prefer to communicate orally with others and tend to be more comfortable with small talk. They enjoy the back-and-forth banter. Introverts would rather communicate through writing and that’s how they learn best. Small talk can be more of a challenge for them.

Ambiverts are comfortable with both

Ambiverts have the energy extraverts have to attend networking events. They don’t give into the temptation to blow off an event after a hard day of looking for work. Ambiverts are also more open to meeting with someone for an informational meeting, whereas introverts may be a bit reluctant.

Written communications is generally considered a strength of introverts. They love the time to collect their thoughts and then write them down. Generally extraverts are impatient with written words; they prefer speaking to learn. Ambiverts also excel at writing their resumes, LinkedIn profile, and other written communications.

Do ambiverts exist?

Ambiversion is widely considered to be a farce by many members of the LinkedIn group I’m a member of, Myers-Briggs Type Indicator Assessment, who claim you prefer one or the other. Yes, we have the ability to utilize all traits on the spectrum, but the consensus among the group is an ambivert doesn’t exist.

One member writes: “…I’m not offended by the word ‘ambivert’ but I do think it dismisses the idea embedded into the MBTI that we all have innate preferences and can learn to utilize skills from other parts of what are truly the spectrum, not dichotomies.”

Another member of the group explains we have a preference for introversion OR extraversion, while some are more comfortable adapting the traits of the other type. Ambiversion is merely a term to explain this: “We all have an innate preference for extraversion OR introversion. Someone with a level of type development that allows them to comfortably and adeptly execute behaviors associated with BOTH preferences is an ambivert.”

My take on all of this is that an introvert can utilize the traits of an extravert and vise versa, and should feel secure with this knowledge. However, if he/she doesn’t like to be labeled an introvert, there’s always the ambivert title to fall back on. Now, a true student of the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator would tell Mr. Pink he’s practicing poetic license.

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Younger interviewers, 9 reasons why you shouldn’t discriminate against older workers

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As a followup to 6 reasons why older workers should not discriminate against younger interviewers, this is the flip side of age discrimination.

I hate seeing trepidation in the eyes of my older workers. It concerns me and then I get angry. The reason for their trepidation is because they fear that employers will pass them over because of their age.

Job interview

I assure them that only a few interviewers will practice age discrimination—usually the ignorant ones—but sometimes my words will fall on deaf ears. The doubt has already been planted in their minds.

They’ve heard stories about how older job candidates are asked question that are designed to figure out how old they are. An obvious question about age is, “So, when did you graduate from high school?” They nod at the transparency of this question.

This is the kind of crap my older workers face. This is the reason for their fear, even before the interview has begun. Essentially their chances of doing well during the interview are slim to none because they are already psyched out. And then I get frustrated because of their fear.

So younger interviewer, here are some things to consider.

1. Older workers know more about the job than you do, but they’re not there to take you job. A common complaint of my older workers is the hiring managers’ lack of knowledge, which is reflected in the questions they ask. Beyond that, older workers have been at their career for 20, 30, or more years. It reasons that they have more experience than younger workers.

But they also say that they simply want to be hired for the job for which they’re applying. They’re not interested in taking the hiring manager’s position. Some of them want to step back and rid themselves of management responsibilities, they don’t want the stress.

2. Older workers are dependable. You’re mistaken if you think older workers will miss work due to illness, mental health days, child care, and any other excuse you can think of. They have a work ethic and commitment to work that is ingrained in them.

My father worked six days a week, and I try to emulate his work ethic. I arrive early to work, even though I don’t have to, and am willing to come in early and stay late, if necessary. This is because they can; I don’t have the commitments younger workers have, namely children.

3. Older workers also are not interested in jumping from job to job. They believe in loyalty. You can be assured that they will want to make your employer’s company their second home. So there’s no sense in asking them where they plan to be five years from now. They plan to be with you.

In a Forbes article, it states the average tenure for older workers is approximately 4.4 years, whereas the tenure for the millennials is half that. Here’s a great post from my valued connections, Catherine Miklaus, that explains the job-hopper mindset.

4. Older workers have life experience that helps them solve unusual problems. Some older workers have experienced loss. In some cases they’ve lost loved ones and or jobs, which has forced them to adapt to adverse situations.

The ability to adapt to adverse situations makes older workers natural problem solvers. They think calmly under pressure because they’ve seen the problems and have learned from their mistakes. Practice makes perfect, as they say.

5. Older workers want to work. A common misconception is that older workers are waiting until retirement comes. The fact is that if the work is stimulating, they will work years beyond retirement age.

One of my colleagues is beyond retirement age, yet she says she would work as long as she could, because she enjoys the responsibilities and the people with whom she works. Trust the older candidate when she says she has no plans to retire.

6. Older workers can be a great mentors and may teach you a valuable thing or two. People who want to progress in their career understand the importance of a mentor who can help them with the technical, as well as the emotional, aspects of their job.

Older workers, who have more job-related experience, also have developed emotional intelligence (EQ) that comes with the trials and tribulations of their work. Older workers know themselves and others’ limitations.

7. Older workers will make you look good because you hired the best candidate. Come on, would you rather hire someone who you’re not threatened by, or someone who can be a great asset to your team? Okay, that’s a difficult question to answer.

But here’s the thing; when you hire a poor worker, that person doesn’t work out and the company loses between $25,000 and $50,000 finding his/her replacement. And you look really bad. Trust me when I say older workers don’t want your job; they just want to work. Period.

8. Older workers may not be as fast as you, but they works smarter, not harder. So you take the stairs two steps at a time, you work 12 hours a day and see this as productive, you never take vacation (idiot), you multi-task your ass off.

Older workers don’t do any of that foolishness, because they do the job once and get it right. I used to be in a hurry to get nowhere, until I realized that it’s better to work smarter, not harder. It may seem like a cliche, but it works. So don’t laugh when I’m walking down the hall and you’re running. We’re both getting there.

9. Older workers don’t think they’re all that. I’ve had the privilege to work in a young, vibrant environment, and a more mature professional one. I’ve enjoyed both, even the Nerf Footballs zipping by my head. But I have to say that the younger workers were more concerned about their pride than the older workers with whom I’ve worked.

Rest assured, younger interviewer, that we older workers have experienced our successes and the peak of our career. We’re not into the fast cars, perfectly manicured hair style, and taking credit for your work (at least I hope not). You can be “all that.” We’ll look on with admiration.

When you’re interviewing the man with grey hair sitting across from you, don’t judge him before getting to know him. He possesses many of the attributes I’ve described, plus some. Ask the questions you’d ask anyone applying for the job. It’s likely that he’s expecting you to demonstrate bias, as he’s experienced it before, so surprise him and be the better man.

10 ways to beat the interview nerves

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Nervous candidate

This post appeared on recruiter.com.

Have you been so nervous during an interview that you temporarily forget your name or what your previous title was? It happens. Have you been so nervous that the cup of water you’re holding is shaking beyond control? Sure, it happens. Or have you been so nervous that you can’t shut up? Oh yeah, it happens.

The fact is most people are nervous during an interview; some worse than the aforementioned examples. But how can you keep your nervousness under control?

First you must understand that it’s natural to be nervous before and during an interview; that nervousness can overcome anyone, even the most qualified people for the job. But even if you are qualified, expect some butterflies in your stomach, sweaty palms, and dry mouth.

As a nervous job candidate, the best you can do is accept your nerves and try to manage them. To do this, it’s important to do the following before and during the interview.

Before the interview

1. Be as prepared as you can. You’ve heard this many times; and if you’re smart you’ve done something about it. You’ve researched the job so you can recite the responsibilities. The same goes for the company. You must go beyond the cursory reading of the job description and company website. Talk with someone at the company, if possible. Also, if you’re on LinkedIn peruse the profiles of the people who will be interviewing you.

2. Practice. Professional athletes don’t go on the baseball field or soccer pitch without practicing in between games. My valued LinkedIn connection and executive coach, Greg Johnson, reminds us that mock interviews or even practicing answering questions in front of the mirror can help reduce the nerves, as it prepares you for the real thing.

3. Request a pep talk. I know, you’re stoic and don’t need others’ help. Everyone can use help for those who are willing to give it. One of my favorite things to do is pump people up before they interview the next day. Simply telling them that the interview is theirs because they’ve prepared for the meeting, they’ve practice, and they’ll be rested for the interview.

4. Get a good night’s sleep. As basic as this seems, being well rested is essential to doing well. Remember the days when you crammed for high school or college exams, trying to mash all that information into one night? Didn’t work too well, did it? Same goes for the interview—do your research over two, three, for days; as it’s easier to remember the information.

5. Take a walk. The day of the interview, I used to take walks. The reasons I did was 1) to relax my mind, clear the negative thoughts, and 2) practice answering the questions I predicted (related to number 2). I gave myself enough time to complete my walk and put on my best duds. It’s important that you feel good and look great before going off to the interview.

During the interview

6. Admit that you’re nervous. That’s correct. Make a brief statement about how you haven’t interviewed in a while and might have some jitters but are very interested in the position. This will explain a slow start until you warm up and get into high gear. This doesn’t give you the right to completely lose your nerves; eventually you’ll settle down.

7. Don’t let the questions that are very difficult get to you. There are bound to be some questions that stump you, but don’t lose your head if no answer comes to mind. Instead ask if you can think about the questions a bit longer by saying, “That’s a very good question and one I’d like to answer. Can I think about this a bit longer?” Don’t take too long, however.

Note: To make matters more difficult, interviewers are wary of answers that sound rehearsed. Take the weakness question: interviewers have heard too often the, “I work too hard” answer. It’s disingenuous and predictable. And never answer, “What is your greatest strength?” with you’re a perfectionist, an answer that carries negative connotations and is, again, predictable.

8. Use your research to your advantage. Whereas some candidates may seem naturally composed and confident, your knowledge of the job and company will be impressive and negate any nervousness you have. Your advanced research will show your interest in the position and the company, something any good interviewer will appreciate.

Note: Start an answer or two with, “Based on my research, I’ve learned that…. Simply hearing the word “research” will go over very well with the interviewers.

9. Remember you’re not the only one who’s nervous. Come on. Do you think you’re the only one in the room who’s nervous? Many interviewers will admit that they’re also nervous during the interview; there’s a lot at stake for them. They have to hire the right person, lest they cost the company someone who’s a bad fit or not capable of doing the job.

10. Lastly, have fun. Come on, Bob, you’re thinking. Seriously, don’t take yourself so seriously. Be yourself. You’ve done all you can to prepare for the interview, the research, the practice, a good night’s sleep, etc. What more can you do? Show the interviewers you are relaxed and calm…and right for the job. Have as much fun as you can.

Anyone who tells you interviews are not nerve-racking think you were born yesterday. I’ve had exactly two people in eight years tell me they enjoy interviews. Those are people who must either be ultra confident or out of their mind. Even job candidates who do well at an interview, experience some jitters and recall times when they could have done better, including keeping their hand from shaking while holding a cup of water.

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Photo by xianrendujia on Flickr